Some Dirty Jokes for a Sunday Afternoon

I was reminded of some good dirty jokes yesterday. I told a few of them, but only those relavent to the conversation. Today, I’d like to share with you a few I didn’t share yesterday.


An old bull and a young bull stand on a hillside, overlooking a pasture. The young bull says to the old bull, “Hey, let’s run down and fuck one of those heifers.” The old bull replies, “let’s walk down and fuck ’em all.”

A farmer has two old bulls and, feeling they’ve lost their exuberance, buys a young bull. As the young bull begins industriously mounting one cow after another in the pasture, one of the old bulls starts pawing the ground and snorting. “What’s the matter,” says the other. “You getting young ideas?” “No,” replies the first bull. “I don’t want that young fellow to think I’m one of the cows!”

Bill and Mike are escaping from a battlefield in the skin of a cow. Mike, in front, starts running faster and faster, with Bill bringing up the rear. Mike suddenly stops and gasps, “It’s no use, Bill, brace yourself – here comes the bull!”

Texas, where men are men, and sheep are terrified.

Why do women love Jesus? Because he’s hung like this: *spreads arms wide*

A guy takes his girlfriend to Jamaica for a romantic weekend. The first day, he gets her name tattooed on his cock. When it’s erect, it reads “WENDY” and “WY” otherwise. They go to the beach the next day, and they see another guy with “WY” on his cock. They ask him if he, too, has a girlfriend named Wendy. He says, “No, mine says ‘Welcome to Jamaica. Have a nice day.'”